Newt and I have Trust Issues

This is Newt requesting that she be allowed to go outside.  I say she is requesting, but it sounds very much like she is demanding to go outside! She extends her communication beyond verbal language by pacing at the door until I look her way, then standing on her back legs while she grabs the door knob with her front feet and meows.  She wants out.  She wants it bad.  

If I don't allow her to go outside, she positions herself so that she can make a mad dash for the door when I'm not paying attention.  Like a calico lightning bolt.  And she runs away from me if I try to bring her back inside.  Sigh... 

Max was never allowed outside when we lived in apartments and subdivisions, and now that he's the age of coyote bait (eighteen) he's smart enough to enjoy gazing out the window from a soft blanket.  Ditto is such a scaredy cat that even when the door is wide open he doesn't venture beyond the threshold.  A gentle breeze sends him scurrying for safety.  

But Newt wants to go outside.  She wants to hunt.  Especially right at dusk, when the little critters are beginning to move.  I laughed while watching her first interaction with the chickens.  She stalked them, slowly creeping through the grass toward them, with her tail bushy and twitching and her ears  held down to her head, and then she pounced on one of the poor hens.  She was awarded with an exciting commotion in the flock, but hasn't tried that trick again.  Maybe she needs to wear a bell...

I've been trying to restrict her access to wildlife by only letting her outside in the evenings when I am home, even though it goes against my love of critters to unleash a predator in their midst.  The death toll so far is a dead vole and, as special gift for Brandon, an almost dead mouse.  She's no dummy, and asks to come back inside if it's raining and when it gets dark.  After all, she doesn't want to miss dinner!  

Considering I only get a few hours of freedom myself each day, I don't think it's too cruel to protect the wildlife by restricting her access.  At least she's allowed to take naps and play with her buddies all day instead of having to sit at a desk.  She even has windows in her office!

Brandon said that Newt and I have trust issues.  I don't trust that she's not going to kill the wild birds and critters I am trying to promote.  I don't trust that she won't get hit by a car, or eaten by coyotes, either.  She doesn't trust that I'm not going to lock her back in the house, so she darts away from me when I get within grabbing range when we are outside together.  Brandon is right, we don't trust each other.